Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Take Back Riverton Mini-Park

There has been a lot of talk in recent weeks about "taking back" parks. But in all our grand plans, I think we've made some really startling omissions. And so it is with this belief in mind that I announce the next step in our municipal green-space takeover: taking back Riverton Mini-Park.

The Tukwila Parks & Rec website has this to say about the Riverton Mini-Park:
This small .1 acre park site is located off South 133rd Street. Facilities at the site include an open grass area and picnic area.
It is imperative that this .1 acre not fall victim to the scourge of our streets. This is not just about laws... this is about the future.

I am, as regular readers will understand, an observer. I tend to sit on the sidelines, watch the world take its course, and then ponder, and finally write. Well, I have waited. And I have watched. And it is time, finally, to write.

You are all fine citizens. Upstanding, right-minded folk. As such, I am sure that you are all well aware of the Tukwila park rules. These rules are in place for our protection, for our well-being. Without these rules, without abiding by the regulations handed down by our elected officials, we tread the line of anarchy.

There is one rule, one formal declaration that stands out to me today - Rule 9: "Inflatable toys & other objects require approval by the Parks and Recreation Director."

I get the impression, walking around our fine park, that some among us do not take these rules seriously. Just today I spied two children carrying balloons, and one carrying an inner tube (for what body of water I couldn't say). I personally contacted the park director and was stunned to discover that none of these individuals had received the aforementioned approval. Do these people think that that these aren't "inflatable toys"? If so, then they are sorely mistaken.

So I put this task to you: arrive at Riverton Mini-Park this Friday, lunch in hand. And don't just bring lunch... bring pins. Bring needles. And most of all bring your community spirit. I, for one, refuse to let these brash criminals take control of our public space. And I hope you feel the same way.


Anonymous said...

Ah, finally. A legitimate use for all those needles you find in the park.

Does the Link go there?

izenmania said...

Hm... no, not yet. There was some talk of possibly constructing a massive centipede made entirely of Segways to give us more hill handling power... I bet that could make it out to Tukwila.

Anonymous said...

I, uh, was seriously reading this all the way to its (April Fools) end. Good one!